Living Life Backwards I want to live my next life backwards: You start out dead and get that out of the way. Then you wake up in an old age home feeling better every day. Then you get kicked out for being too healthy. You enjoy your retirement and collect your pension. Then when you start work, you get a gold watch on your first day. You work 40 years until you're too young to work. You go to school, drink alcohol, party, and get lucky. You become a kid, you play, and have no responsibilities. Then you become a baby where you are loved, cuddled and people bend to your every whim. You spend your last 9 months floating peacefully in luxury, in spa-like conditions: central heating, room service on tap... and then... You finish off as an orgasm Yep ... Backwards is the way to go.